You drop your kids off at your soon-to-be ex-spouse’s house, not knowing what they have in store for this weekend. Your spouse parks them in front of the television, choosing to play bass guitar over spending time with them. On Saturday morning, your spouse forces the kids to get up early to come to the tennis court. The kids complain that they are hungry, but your spouse tells them to “Get over yourself. You can wait to eat.”
This conduct is the trademark behavior of a narcissist. As is evident through their behavior, a narcissistic parent will do whatever it takes to get their way, often at the child’s expense.
At Query Sautter & Associates, LLC, our focus is on doing what is in the best interests of your child. If you are dealing with a narcissistic parent as part of a child custody battle, our South Carolina custody attorneys want to hear from you.
Signs of a Narcissist
Although, on the surface, a narcissist may appear charming, enthusiastic, and trustworthy, when the outer layer is removed, they lack the empathy needed to be a caring parent. A narcissist will frequently manipulate others to get what they want.
Although a self-absorbed person may be labeled a narcissist, nine criteria must be met to reach a formal diagnosis:
- A grandiose sense of self-importance: Narcissistic people often feel the need to brag about their accomplishments. They may also have unrealistic goals.
- Delusions of grandeur: Narcissistic people often have fantasies of unlimited success or power.
- A sense of self-superiority: Narcissistic people think that they are so unique and special that they are of a higher caliber than the general public.
- A need for excessive admiration: Whereas most people do appreciate the occasional compliment, narcissists usually fish for compliments on a regular basis.
- A sense of entitlement: Narcissists will often expect special treatment, even when it is not warranted. When they are not catered to, narcissists will feel disappointed and even resentful for not getting their way.
- Exploitative behavior: Narcissistic people will pursue certain relationships based on what the other person can do for them, not based on a personal connection.
- A lack of empathy: Narcissists lack the ability to understand how other people are feeling, causing them to lash out when other people express emotions.
- Frequent envy: While anyone can be envious from time to time, narcissists frequently want what other people have. They will even go as far as belittling other people’s success.
- Arrogance: With a strong sense of superiority, narcissists will act aloof, providing condescending remarks.
How to Win a Custody Battle with a Narcissist
If your spouse shows trademark signs of being a narcissist, you need to establish boundaries and emotionally distance yourself. Since a narcissist has a warped sense of reality, there is no point in arguing with them.
To prevent your spouse from winning custody of your children, you should take the following steps:
Document the Narcissistic Behavior
To win custody of your children, you need to provide concrete evidence of your spouse’s narcissistic tendencies. Any evidence of the person failing to pick up the kids on time or not following through on promises can be used against them in court.
Even though text messages, e-mails, and any written correspondence is the strongest type of evidence, if possible, record any conversations. Witness testimony can help to support such evidence and even corroborate your recounting of events.
Do What is Best for Your Child
While co-parenting with a narcissist can be challenging, you need to keep your child’s best interest in mind. This means you should not bad mouth the other parent in front of your child but instead, focus on providing a safe and comfortable home environment.
Seek Legal Counsel
Above all, it is important to keep in mind that you are dealing with a narcissist. This person is incapable of understanding emotion and is only looking out for their own interests, not your child’s.
While having the support of family and friends is crucial when dealing with a narcissistic partner, it is critical that you hire a South Carolina custody attorney. Our legal team has experience dealing with difficult people, and we will provide you with the emotional and legal support that you need.
Speak with a South Carolina Child Custody Attorney Today
When seeking counsel for your child custody case, you need the legal team of Query Sautter & Associates. We have successfully represented countless clients, helping them obtain child custody in difficult situations. To learn more, contact us by phone or by completing our online intake form today.